How to have a very BULLSH!T Valentine’s Day

Ha! I like this!

BULLSHiT

For some reason, Valentine’s Day represents all kinds of pressures for both individuals in a relationship, so we’ve decided to do a good deed and help you all out this year. We’ve been kind enough to put together a crash course for Valentine’s Day, detailing the perfect gifts, sexy ideas, dates and cards to impress your loved one, or seduce a new interest.

We guarantee that these romantic tips will not only make your relationship 100% stronger and happier, but they will also increase your weekly servings of red meat.

Perfect gifts:

A one year gym membership:
Being comfortable enough to try and change your partner’s physical appearance is the emotional equivalent of second base. And remember, nothing says “happy one month anniversary” like trying to lock someone into a binding relationship for the next year.

Chocolate moulded into the shape of their face (or genitals):
Caesar had statues built to remember his…

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#nojudgment 8 Things You Should Never Be Ashamed Of

Typical Blogger

By May June

Our society is full of artificial norms and fake standards. Whatever is attractive is whatever you’re not. Whatever is normal is whatever you’re not. Whatever is popular is whatever you’re not.  Whatever is ideal is whatever is impossible.

Despite this, people are going to judge. You can’t stop them. But you can stop caring. Instead of worrying what others are going to think, embrace your quirks and guilty pleasures.

Surround yourself with people who love you for who you are and screw the haters. You should never have to start a sentence with, “No judgment, but…”

Be unique. Be spontaneous. Be free. If you’re not going to be you, then who will?

To get you started, here are 8 things you should embrace and never have to hide. Enjoy!

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The Easy Life

In life, we all go through trials and tribulations, tough situations with painful emotions and life changing circumstances. No one is exempt not even the seemingly perfect people in our lives. Love and grief are the emotions in life that probably affect our inner peace and happiness the most. We make our lives complicated by the choices we make everyday but life itself is easy. Little mistakes can be life-altering as well as fate sealing.
How to live life freely:
1). Remember all things in life are fixable, there’s a solution to every problem
2). Loneliness is only a state of mind…find comfort within yourself
3). Love is true when your heart is true, it knows your brain better then you do but your brain knows your heart better then you do as well

Finding happiness is about finding yourself and surrounding yourself with people who are genuine and love you for you despite your worst flaws. You can choose to be complicated and choose your own sense of completion. See, life is as easy as you make it, just CHOOSE it.

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The “in between” the “in between the lines”

Some people are more dense then others. Some people, and we all know them, are able to read in between the lines and can decipher our exact meaning behind our thoughts and intentions. Others are only able to see what’s point blank. Those people are very annoying and explaining myself gets repetitive. I’m sure you have wanted to shake someone and yell “duh! Take a hint”.

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The Act Of Failing To Remember Who You Are

Everyone  has a midlife crisis and some people have them daily. I think that everyone second guesses themselves even the most confident and self-assured of people. I know I have my days where I feel so lost. What do I really want to do as a career? Am I going in the right direction in life? Am I good enough parent? Do my shoes even match my outfit today?  LOL. Are my friends really loyal to me and am I as loyal as I should be to them? I know deep down I just have to remember who I really am and by doing that I’m realizing my strengths and weaknesses. Knowing what those are, I can better my knowledge of  thy self  and then become a better person. This will ultimately lead to confidence and love for myself. I know I struggle to decide who I am, not everyday but certainly enough, do you?

Positively Negative Thinking

Is your glass half empty or have full? Are you a positive Percy or a negative Nancy? I’m more of a doubtful Doug if you ask me. If my cup is half full or half empty depends on what is in it. If it has wine in it, then its a very positive thing if its half  lol. Either way, i’m going to need more wine eventually…doubtful thinking is me wondering if I really need to fill my cup more then stressing about it. I am indecisive and it comes from being a Virgo and being a worry wart, or a worry beauty mark (sounds better). There are studies that show that being a positive thinker helps reduce stress and can promote a healthier lifestyle. Positive thinking can be hard when you are facing life’s most challenging vices and being told to cheer up makes you feel like smacking someone. “Easy for you to say, you’re not going through this”. Ways to cheer yourself up are easy you just have to want to feel better because of course, misery loves company.

The Dispersion Of Attachments

How many people are trying to get over their EX? Millions I would say and those people are a crying, emotional, and regretful bunch.  Memories and thoughts of the past echo through every emotion because relationships are dreams, and when those relationships fail, our dreams with it die. RELATIONSHIPS = DEATH.  Haha just kidding… breakups are comparable to death and require a mourning period. There are different ways to mourn the death of a relationship.

  1. Rebound….Takes the mind off the situation and person. This can cause major drama in the meantime and cause a vicious cycle of rebounds that never end till all we all are is a rebound (bummer)
  2. Excessive drinking…helps to numb all the depressing feelings that creep up over every corner, temporarily or at least until the next run to the liquor store. Its possible to cause a real funeral doing this (all bad)
  3. Obsession…Everyone gets a little crazy sometimes and who doesn’t feel flattered knowing that everything about them is being over thought and what really is wrong with calling them 50 times just to hear their voice over 1 more time (overboard)

I remember my first love very well and its demise even more. I remember tears spilling over people who looked like him, said the same words as him.  The pain was practically physical as my heart ached I wondered how I would ever live without him.  Foolishly so, as I was young and in love, the dream of having a family and being  together forever was like floating on a cloud with the occasional  sunless day.  One day a thunderstorm struck and my love took form of raindrops that dropped heavily and soon evaporated thereafter. The correct way to mourn was through time and eventual healing of my heart, soul, and mind. Time apart with gradual separation from  memories and past hopes for the future was the only way I successfully moved on and could let my heart mend. Duct tape really does fix everything BTW 😉

Why???? There are many reasons why relationships fail and die a rotten death. Sometimes mistakes are made, love is taken for granted, we fall for the worst match for us, or sometimes it is just not meant to be. Each relationship is like a stop in the road. Some are caution and yield signs.  Other relationships are stop signs and heaven forbid we run those. With each passing one we need to pause to reflect and learn from it, not doing so causes you to be unprepared for oncoming traffic which leads to accidents (possible unwanted kids, domestic violence, crappy in-laws, messy divorces, etc).  At the end of the trip we will all make it to our destination but without the stops we can’t really appreciate or be happy to be there finally. Breakups are needed to help us get to who we should be with and fill us with the compassion to enjoy the right one.

Why Valentines Day Sucks

February 14 is a crappy bullshit holiday. Why am I so bitter you ask? I am not actually, I just feel everyday you should treat your man/woman like gold not just one day out if the year. Alot of people place the value of their relationship on a single day instead of valuing every moment with them. Yes, I am single but you won’t see me crying about being alone, I enjoy being single. Unfortunately, most of my single friends don’t feel the same and I’ll be on the phone with teary eyed ladies and even gents who want to know why they must suffer a reminder that they haven’t found “the one” yet. Valentines day hurts more people I think, then helps. In the past I’ve had my share of roses, fine dining, chocolates, and teddy bears and that was all great but all material as well. I can’t say I miss spending money trying to impress that special someone either. Well I hope the truly in love enjoy the day, for the rest of us…remember, it is just another Thursday ; )

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Fact or Fiction

People often question the basics in life such as love, trust, friendship, etc. The most basic “facts” of life. We learn as children what love is and what a friend is, but as we grow up we let life complicate what we have always known. Over thinking and “reading between the in between the lines” in every situation and every problem tend to create something out of nothing. I am learning everyday that currently, that things in life ARE what they ARE. Point blank. No amount of analyzing will create change or a difference. Denial of ones true feelings over a situation will always change fact to fiction. Loss of trust can make a person want to believe in fiction and as much as we all want this break from reality, sometimes, acceptance is key. Self acceptable begins with discovering a comfortable knowledge of truth. Love can be messy and misleading but fact is, life is messy. #fact. Life without complications and easy solutions of problems we can always move on from…#fiction. Accept simple truths and son you will see that fact and fiction is just another page in the book of life.